...OK, not really, but I don't see why it shouldn't be.

I have, over the years, faithfully chronicled the rise of anti-Valentine's Day sentiment (2006, 2006, again, 2007, 2008).  I don't feel one way or another about most holidays, if you want to know the truth, but I do tend to slightly favor those that shy away from large drunken crowds armed with noisemakers and incendiary devices.  So, yeah, Valentine's Day is OK in my book as for all that. 

On the other hand, there are those who go for the fireworks today, too.  Nothing wrong with that, but get a room.  Valentine's Day should not be used to sanction public salaciousness. Personally, I don't particularly care for any but the subtlest, quaintest public displays of affection.  OK, if you're drunken dirty dancing downstairs at Paradise with a future "missed connection": go for it!  But otherwise, my favorite men are like my favorite drink: old-fashioned. 

Don't get me wrong, I'm no prude.  You can be as trashy as you wanna be behind closed doors, but don't lean over the table at some chic restaurant and lick my tongue or spit in my mouth.  Because you and I both know, that's not about us; it's about them.  Stroke my hand, look into my eyes, if I have food on my face please, by all means, feel free to gently remove it.  Just remember: a subtle gesture of intimacy trumps a big, trashy display any day.

I don't care if you're gay, straight, old, young, white, black, blue or red, I don't want to see you frenching, much less practically felching in front of me. If you're not going to invite me to the main event, why should I participate in your foreplay?   Let's face it, trashy Valentine Day exhibitionists are what's given the holiday a bad name and caused this nasty backlash.

I'm a lover, certainly not a "hater," in the current parlance.  Nor do I believe that being anti-anything ever did anybody all that much good.  Being anti-something is not a position of strength.  In fact, being anti-, far from de-legitimizing whatever it is you're against often does precisely the opposite. 

So instead of trashing Valentine's Day, I'd simply like to propose a more inclusive, in-step-with-the-times take on the traditional holiday.  And if you think it's too much to ask, viruses and umbrellas have a day (October 3rd and February 10th respectively).  There's a National Answer Your Cat's Question Day (January 22nd).  Even Hobbits have a day (September 22nd).  I think it's about time FBs and Friends With Benefits got one, too.